The World’s First Fully Sustainable Nightclub

The UK’s clubbing capital tonight proves you don’t have to hug a tree to do you your bit for environmental issues, with the world’s first energy sustainable club ‘Surya’ opens in doors in London tonight.

The Islington based club feature a high-tech danceflooor that generates electricity when danced on. This energy is created through piezoelectricity – the ability of quartz crystals and ceramics to generate electricity through the applied stress of the dancing motion of clubbers. Surya will be powered completely by sustainable energy sources such as wind and sun power, and may even generate enough sustainable electricity to share with neighbouring community.

Alongside the piezoelectric dancefloor will be solar panels, a wind turbine, waterless urinals, low-flush toilets and eco-friendly air-conditioning units. The club will also recycle all glass, metal, plastic and paper used, whilst the club’s owner Andrew Charalambous, promises to donate part of the club’s profits to environmental charities.

Property developer Mr Charalambous, aka Dr Earth (?), has put in an estimated £1million of his own money into  the project. He said –

“Each week millions upon millions of exuberant human beings head out of their houses and into nightclubs to expend large amounts of energy on the dancefloor, We estimate that if you had loads of clubbers dancing vigorously it would provide 60 per cent of the club’s energy needs. With the wind turbines and solar power we aim to provide the energy needs of 14 to 20 local residents. We are the first free energy-donating business in the world”

Dr. Earth is not only a pretend doctor, but also a fully qualified barrister said to be who is worth well over £100million. He has also stood as a Conservative parliamentary MP, and helped back Boris Johnson’s successful campaign to become mayor of London.

DJ’s appearing at tonights launch party include Jade Jagger, Dan Williams, Queens of Noize and Nathan Detroit, with Coldcut promising an ecologically-themed AV set. Not to be outdone, Dr Earth will also be presenting a 10 point environmental “manifesto” for the rest of the world’s nightclubs to follow.

Whether the local Ritzy will be following suit is another thing, but maybe Dr. Earth could advise all their patrons on how to recycle their white plastic stilettos in the correct manner…